Destroying Hope
by vivigirl72000
Summary: AU. What if the Wutai had never surredered due to a certain silver haired warrior switching sides?
1. Default Chapter

 "I will NOT!"

 Tseng sighed and shifted on his office chair. Taking another gulp of coffee he turned to face the young flower girl pacing Shinra's linoleum floor angrily. Sometimes you needed the patience of a saint to deal with Aeris and he was no saint.

 " But Aeris, it's for your own good…" 

 " How can _that_ be for my own good? For the good of Shinra, yes, but me?" Her larger, green eyes caught his for a brief moment before she turned to the window. It was snowing that night but each flake seemed to drift away from the building as if repelled and instead covered the rest of the plate like a thick blanket. Despite this Tseng knew he was lucky; his office overlooked the richer part of Midgar that was full of shops, theatres, and events… The contrast between his and Reno's office at the front of the building was certainly painful.    

 " I just want to go home." Tseng felt a pang of remorse. Were those tears in her eyes or just a trick of the light? He pressed a switch and the room was filled with a warm, artificial brightness.  It seemed crude compared to the subtle glow the moon provided but it showed that she was indeed crying. He thought about turning it off to let her wipe her face and pretend he hadn't noticed but decided not to. Let her cry if she wanted.

      Still it was late now though children were out in the streets throwing snowballs at each other. As if in yearning Aeris pressed her forehead against the cold glass and continued to stare at the night.

   She was young, far too young to be involved in this. Granted he had joined Shinra at sixteen but Aeris deserved a little comfort after all she'd been through. It had been out of his own free will to leave Wutai and come to Midgar and to stay even though he was fighting his homeland. Though who knew at the time?

   Tseng took another drink of coffee; yet again he was thinking about Wutai and letting his feelings get in the way of the assignment. An assignment that could cost him his job, this was no time to feel sorry for the girl or him.

  "Well Aeris," he said standing up. " You know if you don't…"

  " Yes! You don't have to say it again." Aeris turned away from the window and glared at him. 

   "Than I expect to see you tomorrow morning with the right answer." Ignoring him Aeris picked up her small flower basket and strode out the door. Tseng laughed, she may be angry now but tomorrow would be different. Shinra had a way of breaking people's spirits.

 Aeris shivered as she stepped into the cold street and rubbed her arms. Though the snow fell peacefully to the ground the sharp wind stung her arms. While the other people outside had on warm clothing such as wool coats and scarves she had a thin short jacket that barely reached her waist and an already damp summer dress.

 The shops with their warm lights looked especially inviting but Aeris knew her mother was probably waiting for her at home worrying. And besides he couldn't buy anything anyway, it was all too expensive and what shop owner would want a strange slum girl sitting in their shop just to be warm and breathe in the comforting smells of food from the bakery?

  Aeris walked along the streets and tried to ignore the laughter of the other people outside and thought back to the meeting. Would she go again tomorrow? _Yes_, she thought. _I don't have a choice_. She'd have to break it to her mother as best as she could and do what the Shinra wanted her to despite the risks.

   A small girl hit her with a snowball and laughed as it soaked through Aeris' scant coat. The child's face was happy and cheeks were rosy from the cold, unaware of the pain she had caused Aeris and completely self-centred. Usually Aeris would have smiled, let the world see a mask of happiness, but tonight she needed to think of herself and walked on without care.

 The child sulked and ran away to her friends. Her childhood had never been so carefree and innocent; all the time she knew that the Shinra were after her and that the Planet was in danger. 

 Aeris looked behind at the tower and with one last sigh returned t o her home. 


	2. Home Sweet Home

  Aeris opened the door of her small home and let the wave of warmth rush over her cold and tired body. Familiar smells drifted towards and she sighed. Like always her mother was cooking away and the radio was blaring near the sink. Home.

 " Hi Mom!" Aeris put her flower basket on the table and looked at. Like always her eyes were full of love and affection, happy to see her daughter back safely.

 " Oh…hello." She continued cooking as if nothing had happened, diligently ignoring the awkward silence between them. Aeris tried to look at her. Something was wrong, underneath the motherly kindness she was…. was…scared? Worried? Angry? But why? Unless…

  No, she couldn't have. Aeris shook her head as if to disperse of her thoughts. She'd made sure it was safe, she'd made sure, and it was….

 " You didn't sell many flowers today." Elmyra looked at her with her eyes narrowed. 

 " Not many people wanted flowers I guess." Aeris gave a little giggle but the accusing look in Elmyra's eyes made her blush.

 "  Aeris, don't lie to me." Her voice softened and she smiled sadly. " I've already found it." Neither of them had to ask what 'it' was. The letter she received from Shinra a few weeks ago.

  _Miss Gainsborough,_

_ I am sure that you are aware of the war with Wutai. What you are not aware is that how serious the implications of this war are. You have been asked to assist in one of the factions of our attacking force and will serve Midgar. This is, of course, a great honour and you'll be paid and taken care of. Although this is not compulsory you know that not participating will have serious consequences on you and your mother's well being. You have been warned._

 Aeris held her breath and thought long and hard. It had been so easy to simply hide the letter and pretend it didn't exist, deny I like her heritage and special powers but now the time had come when she had to face reality.

 " I hope you realise that I'll never let you go to war." Elmyra put her hand on her shoulder and tried not to sound worried. 

  " I don't think I have a choice." Aeris' head swam as she closed her eyes. This was all happening much too fast; the meeting, her mother's realisation and now this. Before it had felt like she was simply drifting through the world, aware of these events but out of reach. Now she'd fallen and the landing hadn't been soft.

  Elmyra sucked in her breath fast walked back to the food, stirring violently. " We will simply move somewhere else then, let this all blow over and then come back here." She paused and added as an after thought. " Somewhere the Shinra wont find us, just you and me." She turned to Aeris. " Wont that be nice?"

  Aeris looked at her sadly. _Oh mom, you just don't understand._ Yet again she felt alienated from her, she knew that there was no chance they could outrun the Shinra. And what about their debts? They had no money and soon no home. 

  The choice was clear. Aeris would have to go. She couldn't endanger her mother like this, after all she could've thrown out Aeris a long time ago and save herself a lot of trouble but she didn't even though Aeris wasn't hers and she was defending her again. But now she was older, she understood that Elmyra couldn't save her all the time and maybe doing this would be a way of re-paying her for all these years.

 Aeris gave one last sigh and walked up the stairs to her bedroom with a heavy heart. Elmyra didn't call after her, perhaps all these years together made her understand what Aeris was feeling. Either that or she didn't care. 


End file.
